A friend forwarded me a message that goes "If God increases our blessings, it's not meant to be a reward. It's a call to do greater things to others. We don't need to thank Him that we have much while others have little. We have to thank Him because He has chosen to bless us and in return, to be a blessing to others."
Just a quick realization... I have received blessings more than I had expected. But comes with it is a feeling of slight burden that whatever I have, I need to share and more often than not what is being left for me is nothing. The message that I just received helped me to realize the blessings I have received and yet to be received are not for my abundance or satisfaction. Today I realized, blessings are not the material things that you received but the happiness and fulfilled feeling of knowing you've done something greater that most of people cannot - to share.
Showing posts with label Quotes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Quotes. Show all posts
Eclipse
This is a long over due post, I should have posted it 6 days ago but because I was in the province for that long weekend, I don't have the access to the internet. For the time being, the internet connection in our place is limited to the new settlers. As you may know, we've just moved in our new house last June 2009. Hopefully by January of next year, we can have the internet connection.Anyway, have you already witnessed or experienced an astronomical phenomenon called the solar eclipse? I did at the young age of 8 back when we were still living in Leyte. Yes I know the latest solar eclipse just happened recently (July 22, 2009). But I was not aware there was an eclipse happening that time. I remember the first time I had witnessed the solar eclipse. We were at our school. The eclipse was expected at noon, when the sun is at its very highest. I've heard myths that while the earth is partially covered in darkness, lots of evil spirits are roaming around, rejoicing. I've heard elders reminding young ones not to look at the sun directly while the eclipse is happening if we don't want to our sight. To protect our eyes, we were advised to use sunglasses or an x-ray film. Our teacher then, Sir Gaddi (*may his soul rest in peace*), put a large basin half-filled with clean water in the middle of the school's playground. The water mirrored the heavenly phenomenal that produces the excited yells of every innocent students. He shouted to every student who dare move the basin or stir the water or unintentionally covered everyone's view because it spoiled the moment of witnessing the rare 'moon covering the sun' event. It is somewhat fantastic to watch. When the full solar covering happened, the light coming from the sun rays had dimmed. It was mid-day but it feels like a very late afternoon. Later did I know that some part of the Philippines (like in Pampanga) had experienced a total darkness.
Eclipse is a natural phenomenon which produces darkness in areas where the sun rays are covered by the moon's umbra. It lasts in a matter of minutes and seconds. It's not permanent and I could not help but compare it to what we are experiencing in our lives. We have our own several eclipses - those are the episodes in our life when feel lost and dispirited because of overwhelming difficulties, issues and uncontrollable circumstances that confront us in our day to day lives. But just like the eclipse, it is not lasting. When there is darkness, there is light. For every problem, there is a solution. It's only a matter of perspective: either you choose to be responsible to do something with the problem or you just ignore it and be confronted with a much bigger problem later.
Problem is a part of the natural cycle in our life. Do not expect that the problem you resolved today is the last problem you will be facing in the your entire life. What you can do? Two things: Prepare and Pray.
Prepare
1. yourself to be strong
2. for things that can eventually help you (like savings, most of the life problems can be resolved financially)
3. spiritually and
PRAY for God's guidance and help to strengthen you in your course.
For a little perspective, I would like to leave you this inspirational quote from Mary Kay Ash:
For every failure, there's an alternative course of action. You just have to find it. When you come to a roadblock, take a detour.
There are many plans in man's heart but only God's plan will prevail
I have always been passionate about life. This was how I was raised: to embrace the life I was given and make the most out of it. By high school, all my plans were laid out. I pretty much know what I want to accomplish. The plan was just simple, I thought: continue my studies to college, get a degree, graduate with flying colors, work corporate, buy a house and lot, help my parents send my siblings to school, marry at age 27, and don't be a nagging wife (lol).
Continuing college
How I finished my schooling is a very long story. I stopped for a year after graduating high school. For financial reason my parents could not send me to college. I'd took a chance here in Manila, I ended up staying at my half-sister in Pampanga. I didn't have the advantage of choosing a degree course so I ended up taking 2-yr diploma in computer related course. I worked hard. I landed several small paying jobs while studying: grocery cashier, assistant in an office insurance, jollibee crew. In two year time, I graduated. I never got the degree I was planning to have (one down from my plan) but I graduated with an award.
Going corporate
I was still in my first year college when I decided to apply for an office position in Cybercity Clark. I haven't heard any feedback from my application until after a year they offered me an encoder position for a project based which will only last for three months. I was still a Jollibee crew then and two months away from receiving my diploma. I submitted my resignation letter and right away signed the contract. Never did I know that this will mark the very first step of my ladder to working corporate.
The challenge
After two months that I was working, my family (residing in Leyte by then) decided to join me and live in Pampanga for good. To add to my difficulties, the project I was working on was terminated. It was like the burden of the world was placed upon my shoulder. No work. No savings. Mouths to feed. Responsibilities. For a moment, I wanted to just *puff* and be gone. But life was not design that way. I knew I have to go on striving to live and never to lose hope. I was fervently praying to God to help me find a job - a better job. I applied for different companies in Clark, I did not mind working in a factory anymore. I gave up my dream of working corporate. I was accepted as a Quality Control in Luen Thai. With a pending medical examination, I was good to start with my new work. It was a twist of fate, my half-sister passed me the job application she was hesitant to have. I went for it and I was instanty considered for the position. I didn't have the background or the experience of working on softwares but they considered my experience in Cyber City as a good credential. Who would thought that my two-month involvement as encoder in a well-established company wil be my edge in landing the position? And who would thought that this will be the turning point of my career? Guess, only God knows the plan.
Continuing the journey
After three years, I decided to move forward. I sought for changes, improvements and of course challenges. I prayed and what I seek I have found. Answered to my prayers were expressly delivered. And here I found myself the job I so wanted in a busy city of Makati.
But then again, only God knows what will happen next. He gave me something big because He knows the size of problem that will soon greet me. Financial problem? I wanted to help my parents send my siblings to school? That's why He gave me a high paying job! I think, His plan was already there before I laid out mine.
I may not achieved the things I want to have the way I planned it to have. But I'm grateful that God gave me things I need. Following my lists, only one thing is left. Or rather I could say two things: getting married and the enivetable (lol) - don't be a nagging wife. And these two I'm sure are not due to happen soon or let me say again, it depends on the great architecture of my life.
You might wonder what happend to my other plan: buy a house and lot?
As I mentioned earlier, I have achieved things but not the way I want it. My boyfriend and I decided to buy a house and lot as an investment. I may say, we're thinking of future. You see? I have it but it's shared :)
It is very true that we have so many plans at heart but all those plans will never happen if it's not according to God's purpose.
"There are many plans in a man's heart, but Yahweh's counsel will prevail."
With this post, I would like to thank my ate, Ate Amy who had help me financially during my college days. Your kindness dwells in my heart's memory.
And to Suzette. For the love of my first and number one avid reader and supporter, I took the time to add more details and to further improve this post. Thanks for your honest feedback and support dude, really appreciate it :)
You may also like this:
Continuing college
How I finished my schooling is a very long story. I stopped for a year after graduating high school. For financial reason my parents could not send me to college. I'd took a chance here in Manila, I ended up staying at my half-sister in Pampanga. I didn't have the advantage of choosing a degree course so I ended up taking 2-yr diploma in computer related course. I worked hard. I landed several small paying jobs while studying: grocery cashier, assistant in an office insurance, jollibee crew. In two year time, I graduated. I never got the degree I was planning to have (one down from my plan) but I graduated with an award.
Going corporate
I was still in my first year college when I decided to apply for an office position in Cybercity Clark. I haven't heard any feedback from my application until after a year they offered me an encoder position for a project based which will only last for three months. I was still a Jollibee crew then and two months away from receiving my diploma. I submitted my resignation letter and right away signed the contract. Never did I know that this will mark the very first step of my ladder to working corporate.
The challenge
After two months that I was working, my family (residing in Leyte by then) decided to join me and live in Pampanga for good. To add to my difficulties, the project I was working on was terminated. It was like the burden of the world was placed upon my shoulder. No work. No savings. Mouths to feed. Responsibilities. For a moment, I wanted to just *puff* and be gone. But life was not design that way. I knew I have to go on striving to live and never to lose hope. I was fervently praying to God to help me find a job - a better job. I applied for different companies in Clark, I did not mind working in a factory anymore. I gave up my dream of working corporate. I was accepted as a Quality Control in Luen Thai. With a pending medical examination, I was good to start with my new work. It was a twist of fate, my half-sister passed me the job application she was hesitant to have. I went for it and I was instanty considered for the position. I didn't have the background or the experience of working on softwares but they considered my experience in Cyber City as a good credential. Who would thought that my two-month involvement as encoder in a well-established company wil be my edge in landing the position? And who would thought that this will be the turning point of my career? Guess, only God knows the plan.
Continuing the journey
After three years, I decided to move forward. I sought for changes, improvements and of course challenges. I prayed and what I seek I have found. Answered to my prayers were expressly delivered. And here I found myself the job I so wanted in a busy city of Makati.
But then again, only God knows what will happen next. He gave me something big because He knows the size of problem that will soon greet me. Financial problem? I wanted to help my parents send my siblings to school? That's why He gave me a high paying job! I think, His plan was already there before I laid out mine.
I may not achieved the things I want to have the way I planned it to have. But I'm grateful that God gave me things I need. Following my lists, only one thing is left. Or rather I could say two things: getting married and the enivetable (lol) - don't be a nagging wife. And these two I'm sure are not due to happen soon or let me say again, it depends on the great architecture of my life.
You might wonder what happend to my other plan: buy a house and lot?
As I mentioned earlier, I have achieved things but not the way I want it. My boyfriend and I decided to buy a house and lot as an investment. I may say, we're thinking of future. You see? I have it but it's shared :)
It is very true that we have so many plans at heart but all those plans will never happen if it's not according to God's purpose.
"There are many plans in a man's heart, but Yahweh's counsel will prevail."
With this post, I would like to thank my ate, Ate Amy who had help me financially during my college days. Your kindness dwells in my heart's memory.
And to Suzette. For the love of my first and number one avid reader and supporter, I took the time to add more details and to further improve this post. Thanks for your honest feedback and support dude, really appreciate it :)
You may also like this:
22 Things to Keep (by Dero Pedero)
I would like to share an article of Dero Pedero which I happened to read yesterday night from an old 'The Philippine Star' newspaper. I hope that you get the same insight I got upon reading each line.
You are what you eat, and what you don't eat. Similarly, life depends on what you kee and what you don't keep. There are many things in life that people may keep but only a few are truly worth keeping. Here is a list of what to keep and how to keep yourself for a brighter, happier and more fulfilling life.
22 Things to Keep
Keep calm. Life can be unnerving and if you don't make an effort to keep collected and focused, you could easily lose your cool. Take regular, conscious deep breaths to calm and center yourself.
Keep your chin up. Not only is it good for your posture and diminishes your double chin, it also helps you maintain an "I can handle it" attitude. By keeping your chin up, you can keep your head above water.
Keep your word. The true measure of a man is if he keeps his word. Honorable and trustworthy is the man who stands by what he says and promises. It is important the think well before speaking because once a word is uttered and releaased into the universe, tits vibrations could no longer be erased.
Keep in time with your inner drummer. Don't be swayed by others into following the confusing beat of their drums. Although it s sometimes necessary to adjust to the pace of others, it is best to keep in step with your persona rythm and dance to your own music.
Keep in touch with the child in you. The source of creativity in your life is that little child within you. He questions, he marvels, he imagines and invents. Stay in touch with him, and be young and creative for life!
Keep abreast with times. The world is moving so fast. Know what's happening, waht's in style, what's au courant, what's relevant, what's important. Learn the hottest trends and the latest technology. Don't be caught in a time warp or you'll be left behind.
Keep in shape. Your body shape shows your state of health. Your body is the vessel that you journey through life in. Keep it healthy and strong. Don't be one of those people who sya, "I'm in shape; round is a shape!"
Keep your mouth shut. People talk too much. We language ourselves to our own destruction and defeat. Know when to talk and when to shut up. Avoid being verbose. Oftentimes, silence speaks more eloquently that words.
Keep good friends. Good friends are hard to find. Nurture friendships that make your plight through life easier, more meaningful and wonderful. Truly poor is the man who has no good friends.
Keep great memories, not heavy objects. In the very end, good memories of life are what we will be left with, not jewels and riches that we couldn't bring when we finally go. Live each moment beautifully. Linked together, these magical moments create a magnificient life.
Keep a diary. Writing a journal is therapeutic. Record the important events in your life, your dreams and aspirations, even your failures and disappointments. When you trace back events in your life, you are bound to learn lessons from them as well as find great inspiration and strength.
Keep saying grace and thanks. Blessed is he who says grace before he eats and gives thanks for all the gifts he recieves daily. Maintain a thankful attitude and focus on your blessings instead of dissapointments.
Keep on moving forward. The universe moves forward in time. Don't get stuck in the past; make an effort to move ahead to a better life. Drop those unnecessary pices of material and emotional baggage that weigh you down and keep you from flying to your loftiest dreams.
Keep out of danger. He who exposes himself to danger finds it. Don't court danger; avoid it. As they say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Look out for number one (that's you!), and always stay safe and sound.
Keep up the good work. Success is built upon success. The more you do, the more you achieve; the more you achieve, the better you get at doing it. Make success a habit by keeping up the good work.
Keep young. Do everything in your power to stay strong, supple and youthful. Think young; feel young. A wise man once said "It is never too late to be what you might have been." Remember that age is a number and that youth is an attitude.
Keep on dancing. Life is dance through space and time. Embellish whatever music life plays for you with your own fresh orchestration and creative choreography. Be excited in your heart and keep your feet light with happiness.
Keep on loving. Love is the reason we were created. Love diminishes when hoarded but multiplies when shared. Give it and feel it overflow in your heart. Love cures all sadness, pain and sorrow. Lonely is he who does not give love away and therefore gets none in return.
Keep on dreaming. Most men, even if they are young, are dead, that is, if they could no longer dream. Our dreams are what keeps us young and alive; they give us that sparkle in our eyes. Our dreams keep us going even while everything around us says, "Stop."
Keep on hoping. Never lose hope. Tomorrow will be another day that will bring new hope and greater blessings. Keep faith in the abundance of the universe and the mystery and perfection of life. Hope for nothing but the best and that's what you will be granted.
Keep on believing. Belief is the mother of reality. What you believe becomes your truth. Believe in yourself, believe in the magic of the universe, believe in the power of your dreams. And most of all, believe you can do it, so you can have all your heart's desires!
These you must not keep
Don't keep up with Joneses. Just because your neighbor bought a red Ferrari, you, too, must get one. Don't joine the bandwagon and keep away from being one with the herd. Too mcuh unhappiness in this world is caused by comparisons, comparing yourself and trying to measure up the other eople. There is really no need to give up other expectations if it could just bring you inconvenient and misery.
Don't keep issues and grudges. The reason most of us stay miserable is because we kee issues, grudges, and problems. Detox yourself of complaints and issues that keep you from being the best that you could be. Try to solve all problems that beset you; never leave anything unresolved. The questions and puzzles of life are what make it changing and exciting.
Don't keep painful experiences. Life is not a bed of roses so you must learn to let go of negative feelings and memories of painful experiences. It's hard to go on living with a heavy heart. Pardon, forgive, forget if you can, and move on.
You may also like this: 50 Things to Live By (by Maui V. Reyes)
Stop Throwing Away Your Money
I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I was born in a middle class family where both my parents were wage-earner. My mother was very good in handling the family budget. She was able to stretch out the money handed to her by our father. The money which supposedly will last for only a week lasted for over two weeks. Of course, it could not be avoided having debts in sari-sari store but unlike other families in our neighborhood, we were considered as the best-paying debtor.
I remember when I was in grade school, I am used to having 2 pesos as my 'baon'. With that amount of money in my pocket, I was able to buy one orange flavored ice candy or a chocolate one paired with a 50-cent worth of junk food, not a very healthy one (pero solved na ako nun). Everyday, I usually have 50 cents left in my pocket. I collected it for a week and earned 3-5 pesos which I used to buy toys in school (rubber bands, cards, paper dolls, jolens, chinese garter, yoyo, etc). Or sometimes, instead of asking money from my mother I used it to buy school materials like bond papers, writing pad or pencil.
My mother never lectured me with words on how to spend every penny but seeing her actions taught me otherwise. I was young but then I already have this young urge to be frugal. And what drives me? Because I want to help my parents in some little ways I could.
What do I want to point out here anyway?
I heard it usually from elders. I often read it in financial advise forum. That most of the rich people now were not born rich, they are made.
How do they become rich?
They are in action to save up. They value every penny. They stop throwing away their money. They spend it on investments. They plan their budget. They do not splurge themselves with unnecessary things. They cut down credit cards. They have goals. And they have the drive to reach that goal.
When it comes to saving, the hardest part is getting started. Being one that earn thousands a month but got tons of monthly expenses, it is very hard for me to start earning. Honestly speaking, I have a personal account (apart from the payroll account I have) but I wasn't able to maintain the required ADB for that. Very ironic for someone who talks about spending wisely, huh! Here, at least I spent my money on important things and in what ways, that's a different story.
You are not a big time earner but you want to save up a little? Here are some ways you can adapt:
1. Make a list of your monthly expenses. Or better if you cut it down to two-week expenses if you have bi-monthly salary to come up with a realistic list.
2. Set a budget amount. Say your expenses should not exceed 60% of your income. If it exceeds, check out your list then erase those that you can do away.
3. Make sure to include in your budget list at least the 10% of your monthly earnings. When you include the savings into your expenses list, it feels like this is just another expense and not savings.
4. If your budget is tight and you cannot afford to save up the 10%, then develop a habit of going piggy bank. Make sure you always feed your piggy bank any amount each day. Just set the minimum to PHP5.00. Or you can also stash away your crisp 100 peso bill somewhere in your wardrobe or have it pile in between your books or notebook. Before you know it you have already earned an amount which you could use for future purposes or emergency situation.
5. Find ways to make extra money. There are lots of networking out there that will not require you to put up capital. All you could do is register your name, pay for an ID and a brochure then develop a selling skills. You may not earn big time from this especially if you're not that dedicated to their marketing strategies but you could earn 500 to 1000 pesos a month. That's already an add up to your finances.
6. Try to cut down grocery and food budget. Plan your meals in advance. Whenever you go for a shop, make your grocery list and shop with the list. This way, you can avoid buying things not on your list. Buy things on sale but make sure you buy things that you need. It is also good to buy household things (such as laundry powder, fabric conditioner, toothpaste, feminine wash, etc) in bigger sizes. It would save you time and money in the long run.
Always bear in mind that in buying you have to think of two things: Wants and Needs. Ask yourself, do you really need it? Otherwise, do not buy it. Go for things that you really need and not because you only want it.
7. You want to travel? Travel during off season. You can avail lower rates and discounted offers and still get the same excitement and enjoyment of going places. You can also go camping instead of staying in hotels - more fun, more thrill and much more adventurous.
8. Lots of old clothes but still wearable? You can have it on garage sale. Who says you cannot earn money from old stuff?
9. Trim away credit cards. One credit card and you can still survive. Select a credit card that offers great deals yet lower annual fee. If you want gadgets, opt for items that can be bought using your credit card's installment mode. For BPI, they have S.I.P (Special Installment Plan), for HSBC, they H.I.P (HSBC Installment Plan). I advice to transfer your regular balance to your installment balance (I guess applicable only in BPI). This way you don't need to spend big amount at once plus your regular purchases will be controlled.
10. Have a goal. Why do you want to save? Work out and reach that goal.
With these tips, I am not saying you have to tighten your belt, starve yourself to death or deprive yourself. It is good to splurge yourself once in a while but make sure not to over do it. When you've accomplished something and you feel like congratualating yourself, go out sometime, shop for things you want, celebrate and still be in controlled.
Here is a frugal thought from Benjamin Franklin:
I remember when I was in grade school, I am used to having 2 pesos as my 'baon'. With that amount of money in my pocket, I was able to buy one orange flavored ice candy or a chocolate one paired with a 50-cent worth of junk food, not a very healthy one (pero solved na ako nun). Everyday, I usually have 50 cents left in my pocket. I collected it for a week and earned 3-5 pesos which I used to buy toys in school (rubber bands, cards, paper dolls, jolens, chinese garter, yoyo, etc). Or sometimes, instead of asking money from my mother I used it to buy school materials like bond papers, writing pad or pencil.
My mother never lectured me with words on how to spend every penny but seeing her actions taught me otherwise. I was young but then I already have this young urge to be frugal. And what drives me? Because I want to help my parents in some little ways I could.
What do I want to point out here anyway?
I heard it usually from elders. I often read it in financial advise forum. That most of the rich people now were not born rich, they are made.
How do they become rich?
They are in action to save up. They value every penny. They stop throwing away their money. They spend it on investments. They plan their budget. They do not splurge themselves with unnecessary things. They cut down credit cards. They have goals. And they have the drive to reach that goal.
When it comes to saving, the hardest part is getting started. Being one that earn thousands a month but got tons of monthly expenses, it is very hard for me to start earning. Honestly speaking, I have a personal account (apart from the payroll account I have) but I wasn't able to maintain the required ADB for that. Very ironic for someone who talks about spending wisely, huh! Here, at least I spent my money on important things and in what ways, that's a different story.
You are not a big time earner but you want to save up a little? Here are some ways you can adapt:
1. Make a list of your monthly expenses. Or better if you cut it down to two-week expenses if you have bi-monthly salary to come up with a realistic list.
2. Set a budget amount. Say your expenses should not exceed 60% of your income. If it exceeds, check out your list then erase those that you can do away.
3. Make sure to include in your budget list at least the 10% of your monthly earnings. When you include the savings into your expenses list, it feels like this is just another expense and not savings.
4. If your budget is tight and you cannot afford to save up the 10%, then develop a habit of going piggy bank. Make sure you always feed your piggy bank any amount each day. Just set the minimum to PHP5.00. Or you can also stash away your crisp 100 peso bill somewhere in your wardrobe or have it pile in between your books or notebook. Before you know it you have already earned an amount which you could use for future purposes or emergency situation.
5. Find ways to make extra money. There are lots of networking out there that will not require you to put up capital. All you could do is register your name, pay for an ID and a brochure then develop a selling skills. You may not earn big time from this especially if you're not that dedicated to their marketing strategies but you could earn 500 to 1000 pesos a month. That's already an add up to your finances.
6. Try to cut down grocery and food budget. Plan your meals in advance. Whenever you go for a shop, make your grocery list and shop with the list. This way, you can avoid buying things not on your list. Buy things on sale but make sure you buy things that you need. It is also good to buy household things (such as laundry powder, fabric conditioner, toothpaste, feminine wash, etc) in bigger sizes. It would save you time and money in the long run.
Always bear in mind that in buying you have to think of two things: Wants and Needs. Ask yourself, do you really need it? Otherwise, do not buy it. Go for things that you really need and not because you only want it.
7. You want to travel? Travel during off season. You can avail lower rates and discounted offers and still get the same excitement and enjoyment of going places. You can also go camping instead of staying in hotels - more fun, more thrill and much more adventurous.
8. Lots of old clothes but still wearable? You can have it on garage sale. Who says you cannot earn money from old stuff?
9. Trim away credit cards. One credit card and you can still survive. Select a credit card that offers great deals yet lower annual fee. If you want gadgets, opt for items that can be bought using your credit card's installment mode. For BPI, they have S.I.P (Special Installment Plan), for HSBC, they H.I.P (HSBC Installment Plan). I advice to transfer your regular balance to your installment balance (I guess applicable only in BPI). This way you don't need to spend big amount at once plus your regular purchases will be controlled.
10. Have a goal. Why do you want to save? Work out and reach that goal.
With these tips, I am not saying you have to tighten your belt, starve yourself to death or deprive yourself. It is good to splurge yourself once in a while but make sure not to over do it. When you've accomplished something and you feel like congratualating yourself, go out sometime, shop for things you want, celebrate and still be in controlled.
Here is a frugal thought from Benjamin Franklin:
The way to wealth is as plain as the way to market. It depends chiefly on two words, industry and frugality: that is, waste neither time nor money, but make the best use of both. Without industry and frugality nothing will do, and with them everything.
Thoughts and actions intertwined
Watch your thought, for they become words.
Watch your words for they become actions
Understand your actions for they become habits
Study your habits for they become your character
Develop your character for it will become your destiny
My sister's coming of age
I always considered that celebrating the coming of age is always special; should be exceptional. This is the time when a girl is officially considered a woman, not in experience, but in age. This is the official stage when a girl is no longer a child, can no longer be treated as a child.8 years ago. I was the same vibrant, cheerful youth as my sister is. I was very excited to get a little bit older than 17. I thought that if I gain age, my whole world (the world of a 17 year old consisted of her family, friends and classmates, childhood sweetheart, foes, etc) will start to look upon me differently. And true to what I thought, my world started to change but not the way I want it to be. I was expecting that my family will give me a little bit more freedom than I usually enjoy; that my mother who is very strict (then) will finally allow me to entertain suitors, go on a date and have a boyfriend; that I could go home beyond 10p.m. without my mother raging because I'm late; that since I am officially an adult I could have my own decisions with whatever I want to do with my life; and most of all, they will stop treating me as a child and the usual pinching, occasional slapping and berating from my mother will cease. I was all wrong!
What changed? Lots of things changed. I had a curfew, I am not allowed to go out with 'barkada', I am not allowed to laugh out loud or giggle outside, in the middle of the street or whenever boys are around. Boring? Yes, but this is the life I was and still accustomed to. My younger life was spent on home cleaning, tending to my younger siblings, listening to music whole day, attending mass every Sunday, writing my journal to spill out everything, which is supposedly a secret. I told you, if you want to keep something from your family, never write it down on a diary. And studying... Despite all those strictness I don't have any resentment towards my mother because I know that with her disciplining method I've been molded to a better person that I am now.
My youngest sister had just celebrated her debut. She was the baby I look after whenever my mother was tending to other important family stuff. She was the cute girl crying whenever soap bubbles entered her eyes when I was giving her a bath. She was the small kid I was defending every time her playmates bullied her. She was the same little girl I hugged whenever she was scolded. She was my living barbie doll. I used to bring her to school and I stood, a very proud 'ate' whenever my classmates swarmed around her because she was a very sweet and adorable child. I smiled, ear to ear whenever my teacher said "ang cute naman ng sister mo" (your sister is so adorable). She was the baby of the family. Time passes by so fast that the once our baby is now all grown up, charming and beautiful. But she is still vulnerable.
Now I understand why my mother did not give me the freedom I was longing to have because of the same reason I am feeling right now towards my sister's turning point to adult life. I am afraid. I am afraid that she might do a wrong decision that would implicate her whole life. I am frightened because now, she will be more expose to harsh realities of life. And the very thing I am afraid of is seeing her fall in love with a wrong guy. I am afraid that I can no longer protect her and snatch her away from any troubles, failures and sadness she might encounter now that she has to emerge out of her comfort zone.
At her age, she already got so many suitors. And Lord knows how many fling relationship did she already have that were unknown to our mother. Once I asked about her recent 27-year old suitor. "Do you like him?" What I got was just a shrug of her shoulders combined with the words "ewan ko" (I don't know).
She could have directly said yes if she likes the guy or a simple no if not. But based on her reaction, she indirectly spelled out that she likes the guy. Plus, I can see that she is enjoying it. Being a protective sister that I am, I could not help but hope and pray she knows her boundaries and limitations and be strong enough to resists any temptations. I've been there, I've seen the curiosity in my young friends before and I know how younger people behave towards something they'd been longing to discover. I know that she too will feel it but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she will use her head to think first before doing something she will regret for the rest of her life.
I know that each of us have our own time, our own way to discover things and our own intellect to approach things as they are. I could not tie her down and control her every decision. Trusting her and letting her discover things on her own will is also giving her every chance to know herself, to grow into a matured person, and to equip her with lessons that can only be learned from experience. There is something I can offer though, that is giving her valuable advice, guide her and be always there for her whenever she's down. She is no longer the child I used to defend. Even if she still is considered the baby of the family, I need to give her the freedom to fight her own battle. And the best advice that I could give is for her to take life one step at a time, never to hurry and savor every moment of it because she'll gonna miss this when she'd gain age.
As the song goes:
You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this...
God bless her.
God bless her.
50 things to live by (by Maui V. Reyes)
I've been going the ups and downs of life's bumpy ride and still got a little understanding of the true essence of life. When I happen to stumble upon few lines of quotes about life in general, that helps me understand a little about myself.
I've read some qoutable lines in an old article of Philippine Daily Inquirer and can't help but re-post it here. The ones in bold are the ones I like the most and of course those are the ones I can relate to.
LIFE
4. No matter where you go, there will always be bad drivers.
5. If someone compliments you, smile and accept it. Take a moment to remember all the people who helped make you worthy of the compliment.
6. Stop "sleeping on it [problems]." If it were a real problem, you wouldn't be able to sleep anyway.
7. The only permanent thing in life is change. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be happy.
8. Stop worrying about "what-ifs." Things will happen if they're meant to happen.
9. Sunscreen was invented for a reasons.
10. Remember that it takes both rain and sunshine to make rainbows.
11. Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and the world suddenly remembers it has to be somewhere else.
12. Beer doesn't have the answer to problems. It only puts worries on hold.
13. You can't make people like you, and you can't please everyone.
14. Tequila is evil. It will always be evil, so don't expect that it will go easy on you next time.
15. Practice makes perfect, even if sometimes you hit several cars along the way.
16. The opposite of "love" is not "hate," but "not give a damn."
17. Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach -- and flunk those who can.
18. You can cry over spilled milk. Just be sure to clean up afterward.
CAREER
19. If at first you do succeed, try not to act surprised.
20. Always be friendly to the people you meet on your way to the top. You are going to meet them on your way down.
21. To make your dreams come true, you have to wake up first.
22. You are never a failure unless you blame someone else.
23. There are a lot of things taught in school that you think you won't need. And indeed, most of them, you really don't need.
24. The teacher you hate the most gives you the worst grades, doesn't credit you for your efforts, and can't be bought. He goes by the name "Experience."
RELATIONSHIP
25. Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
26. There is a big difference between "like" and "love." Learn which is which.
27. Only you can really hear your heart breaking and your real friends are the one who hear its echo.
28. If you don't have anything nice to say about your neighbor, it's best to shut up, keep things to yourself, and walk away. Why destroy a person's image when you yourself have to work on yours?
29. Sometimes, it's best to keep your feelings to yourself.
30. Cry him/her a river. Then build a bridge and walk over it. You may have to repeat the "procedure" a couple of times before you can stop building bridges.
31. When someone says he/she likes you, he/she just might really mean it.
32. True friends will make fun of what you do but support you all the way. Acquaintances will praise your work, and then not give a damn.
33. It's no use hanging on to a relationship that is only in your head. Wake up and make it happen.
34. A true friend won't jump off a cliff with you. He'll be at the bottom to catch you.
35. If he can't see what an awesome and amazing person you are, move on... while secretly wishing that one day he will.
FAMILY
36. Parents give their children two things: roots and wings. Children give their parents two things: screaming fits and migraines.
37. Remember that someday, you, too, will be getting screaming fits and migraines. So try to reduce what you give your parents.
38. Always remember that your mom had one foot in the grave to bring you to this world. And your father had to bear with her mood swings for nine months.
39. Family isn't just about being related. It's about actually being there for each other through thick and thin.
40. If you want to keep something from your family, don't write it down in your diary. (definitely not write it down)
41. The perfect, normal family is the one that is dysfunctional with many skeletons in the closet.
42. If your mother tells you to brush your teeth before going to bed or your teeth will rot, she's telling the truth.
SELF
43. It's okay to cry and bawl your eyes out once in awhile.
44. Always have some alone time. Watch a movie by yourself, have a drink in a cafe or go shopping.
45. People have their own quirks. But unless they involve public nudity and self-mutilation, don't try to change them.
46. You don't have to wait until New Year's day to make a resolution.
47. Love and respect yourself. If you can't, how will others love and respect you?
48. There is no such thing as a "perfect" body. If there is, then Barbie dolls would have come in different shapes and sizes.
49. Forgive yourself for torturing yourself.
50. You are an awesome person. Don't change for anyone.
I've read some qoutable lines in an old article of Philippine Daily Inquirer and can't help but re-post it here. The ones in bold are the ones I like the most and of course those are the ones I can relate to.
LIFE
1. With regards to problems, always remember that when it rains, it pours. And sometimes, there can be even hailstorm -- even in the Philippines.
2. Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Is it worth all the worrying?
3. There are no shortcuts to any place worth going to.4. No matter where you go, there will always be bad drivers.
5. If someone compliments you, smile and accept it. Take a moment to remember all the people who helped make you worthy of the compliment.
6. Stop "sleeping on it [problems]." If it were a real problem, you wouldn't be able to sleep anyway.
7. The only permanent thing in life is change. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be happy.
8. Stop worrying about "what-ifs." Things will happen if they're meant to happen.
9. Sunscreen was invented for a reasons.
10. Remember that it takes both rain and sunshine to make rainbows.
11. Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and the world suddenly remembers it has to be somewhere else.
12. Beer doesn't have the answer to problems. It only puts worries on hold.
13. You can't make people like you, and you can't please everyone.
14. Tequila is evil. It will always be evil, so don't expect that it will go easy on you next time.
15. Practice makes perfect, even if sometimes you hit several cars along the way.
16. The opposite of "love" is not "hate," but "not give a damn."
17. Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach -- and flunk those who can.
18. You can cry over spilled milk. Just be sure to clean up afterward.
CAREER
19. If at first you do succeed, try not to act surprised.
20. Always be friendly to the people you meet on your way to the top. You are going to meet them on your way down.
21. To make your dreams come true, you have to wake up first.
22. You are never a failure unless you blame someone else.
23. There are a lot of things taught in school that you think you won't need. And indeed, most of them, you really don't need.
24. The teacher you hate the most gives you the worst grades, doesn't credit you for your efforts, and can't be bought. He goes by the name "Experience."
RELATIONSHIP
25. Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
26. There is a big difference between "like" and "love." Learn which is which.
27. Only you can really hear your heart breaking and your real friends are the one who hear its echo.
28. If you don't have anything nice to say about your neighbor, it's best to shut up, keep things to yourself, and walk away. Why destroy a person's image when you yourself have to work on yours?
29. Sometimes, it's best to keep your feelings to yourself.
30. Cry him/her a river. Then build a bridge and walk over it. You may have to repeat the "procedure" a couple of times before you can stop building bridges.
31. When someone says he/she likes you, he/she just might really mean it.
32. True friends will make fun of what you do but support you all the way. Acquaintances will praise your work, and then not give a damn.
33. It's no use hanging on to a relationship that is only in your head. Wake up and make it happen.
34. A true friend won't jump off a cliff with you. He'll be at the bottom to catch you.
35. If he can't see what an awesome and amazing person you are, move on... while secretly wishing that one day he will.
FAMILY
36. Parents give their children two things: roots and wings. Children give their parents two things: screaming fits and migraines.
37. Remember that someday, you, too, will be getting screaming fits and migraines. So try to reduce what you give your parents.
38. Always remember that your mom had one foot in the grave to bring you to this world. And your father had to bear with her mood swings for nine months.
39. Family isn't just about being related. It's about actually being there for each other through thick and thin.
40. If you want to keep something from your family, don't write it down in your diary. (definitely not write it down)
41. The perfect, normal family is the one that is dysfunctional with many skeletons in the closet.
42. If your mother tells you to brush your teeth before going to bed or your teeth will rot, she's telling the truth.
SELF
43. It's okay to cry and bawl your eyes out once in awhile.
44. Always have some alone time. Watch a movie by yourself, have a drink in a cafe or go shopping.
45. People have their own quirks. But unless they involve public nudity and self-mutilation, don't try to change them.
46. You don't have to wait until New Year's day to make a resolution.
47. Love and respect yourself. If you can't, how will others love and respect you?
48. There is no such thing as a "perfect" body. If there is, then Barbie dolls would have come in different shapes and sizes.
49. Forgive yourself for torturing yourself.
50. You are an awesome person. Don't change for anyone.
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